God's Plans are For You... But Not About You

We all have had moments where we want to look at God and say, "Seriously? Where did that come from?"

Whether it's something big and tragic, or just getting stuck behind that lady that wants to drive 25 in a 45, our life is full of moments where we can doubt God's Romans 8:28 promise that "in ALL things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose," (ESV).

Sometimes what He's doing just doesn't feel good. And sometimes that silver lining just isn't there.

Every Season for a Matter

I feel like I continually say that the season of life that I am in is crazy, and crazier than I've been through before. But it's because it continually feels true. Maybe that's just how life is the older you get? I'm not for sure. In the past 6 months, though, I have learned more about adult life than I thought I was ready for. And in my eagerness to grow up and keep experiencing new things, yet also hold on to the security and familiarity of being a child in my parent's house, it's difficult to find the balance between looking ahead in preparation and anticipation, and staying exactly where I am for as long as I can.
Also, it seems that I am a pro for looking ahead so much for the "next thing" that I miss what is in the now. This typically means that the lessons I was supposed to learn, and end up having to learn later after a few more tries;)

Sometimes, though, it just seems like nothing is happening. Sometimes it seems like I'm spinning my wheels for a couple of months, or I'm not seeing the result of things I've been waiting for and praying for. Sometimes I'm just simply bored and frustrated and ready for the next thing!

I stumbled across Ecclesiastes 3:1 in a bible study a couple of days ago:

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven."

That means the season of things I wait for and long for is coming.

That means the season I'm in is the season I'm meant to be in.

That means the season that I've left behind has passed because it is no longer time to be in that season.

And that means that every season I'm in is "for a matter."

God is an economic god. He doesn't waste time or experiences, or even mistakes. There is no such thing as an "empty season" or a "barren season." It may look like one and feel like one, or it may feel like where I am at is a "filler season" in between the one that passed and the one that is coming, but guaranteed there is something here for me. Now is a beautiful thing, gifted so that I might fall more in love with Jesus. And that's never something I want to miss out on.

"And GOD is faithful..."

"No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." - 1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV)

I think it really interesting, and worth noting, that Paul does not write to the Corinthians and say, "Don't worry, your temptations are nothing unusual; everyone faces them. But I believe in you! You are strong overcomers!" 

No, Paul says, "Your temptations are the same every man faces. But God is faithful."

Paul does not give his audience any false hope in themselves, but points them directly to the only source of true strength. 

Sometimes I feel, in our efforts to exhort and encourage others (especially fellow Believers), we can be very quick to point to their own strengths that will get them through. We sound something similar to "Don't worry, So-and-So; I know you have it in you. You're such a strong person, and you've done so much, and you're so good, and you're so great at these things," and so on. But truly, we're all poor and broken sinners incapable of doing one good thing apart from Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit within us.

So it should not be surprising that Paul puts the emphasis on God's faithfulness in his encouragements. He is very aware of how easy it is to encourage someone in their own strength, and very aware of how misleading that can be. Our only strength, our only hope of goodness, lies in Christ.
In addition, that is the only encouragement I can give you in the every day. There are constant temptations to sin or doubt or worry or despair. But God is faithful. And that's something we can count on. 

Just some food for thought. :)

Hope you are all having a fantastic week!

R E S T

"We are offered all of the rest in the world, in greater depth and measure than we could ever imagine, but we only experience as much of it as we believe exists and as much of it as we take."

I wrote that just as I was finishing week 8 at Regent University. Midterm week. So exciting. And here I am at week 13, coming to the end of the semester, and I feel like I'm running just as hard; maybe harder.

It's times like this when rest seems impossible. I find that my sleeping habits are a lot like my car-fueling habits: getting a third of what I need when I'm in desperate need for it because I don't have time for a "full tank." And even rest outside of sleeping is hard to come by when my mind is constantly flying and grasping at my mental to-do list to make sure nothing is forgotten (and often failing... I forget a lot).

Hebrews 4:1 talks about a rest we can miss:

"Therefore, since the promise that we can enter into rest is still open, let's be careful so that none of you will appear to miss it."

The author of Hebrews is probably talking about eternal rest, the rest gained by salvation. BUT it's a part of our inheritance through the death of Christ Jesus that we can pull our eternity down into our life on earth! So we technically have access to the entire rest of the presence of Jesus at all times.

How often do we take advantage of this? I am finding that I hardly do. Instead of taking up this rest, I'm striving just as hard as I am in every other area of life. I'm treating it like homework or ministry or something to get done.

However, my relationship with Him was never supposed to be like this.
It was not designed to be full of me kicking myself while I tried so hard to be perfect.
It was not designed to be a result of the pressure I put on myself to get everything right.
My relationship with the Lord is supposed to look like the pursuit of a groom towards his bride,
or a Father crouched on the floor beside his toddler daughter while she learns to walk.
Both are full of delight.
Both are designed for nothing but joy in the relationship.
And both allow me to enter into the rest and freedom of His love and grace even while my life continually falls short of reflecting His glory perfectly.

That's rest:
Knowing that however many times I mess up or fall short or screw up,
I'm that bride, that could never look more beautiful.
I'm that toddler daughter that causes nothing but a smile to rise on my father's face, even when I trip over myself.
And that's something I could live in.

My Doubts vs. His Display of Faithfulness

We all have those times where we realize, or become significantly more aware of, how far a year has taken us. Typically this time comes around New Years for me, or around my birthday. But this weekend marked a clear moment of reflection on how far the Lord has brought me.

This weekend I was one of 25 leaders on a trip with 350 teenagers from Chesapeake (almost 600 teenagers total) with Young Life. We were in Nags Head, I was leading beside some of my best friends in the world, and spending time with some of the coolest sophomore and junior girls I have ever met. I saw kids laugh and dance and cry and hear the Gospel in a very real way. Literally, my only job while I was there was to love on girls, spend time with them, and watch the Lord change lives.

Where was I last year? Praying that God would give me ministry. Dying to be around high school girls, and fulfill that calling that had been heavy on my heart for years. Frustrated at the lack of open doors for ministry. Why wouldn't the Lord honor my desires to serve, and give me opportunities in ministry?

After this sleepless and busy weekend, we drove straight back to the Young Life house in Chesapeake. I spent the afternoon talking with the other leaders about ways they saw the Lord move in their kids' lives while we played video games and ate great food. I realized, then, how much this group of people had become like a second family to me; a place where I felt safe enough to show weakness and honesty, but where I could always expect a laugh. 

Where was I last year? Desperate for community; tired of struggling through young adulthood on my own. Feeling left out and forgotten. Nobody to pray with or laugh with. No motivation from others in my walk with the Lord. Feeling uncared for. Would He ever give me real friends? or a solid community? Had He forgotten me? 

All of this is pretty cool to think about... but even more so in light of my current frustrations. I'm impatient with endless schoolwork, anticipating a time when I will no longer be single, and itching to be back in Guatemala. But these times of reflections bring encouragement.

What do these reflections say about me? Not much. 

What do these reflections say about the faithfulness of God? Everything.

When I look back on where I've come from, and consider where He's brought me compared to where I am, or where I thought I'd be going, it can be really humbling. It causes my current doubts and frustrations to shrink. Yes; sometimes frustrations last longer than a year, and yes; there are prayers and desires that take much longer to be fulfilled. 

BUT HE'S SO FAITHFUL.

I never would have imagined that the Lord would bring me to a place that was both so sweet and so challenging. So why should I doubt that He won't continue leading me? Why should I doubt that He still has amazing plans for me beyond my imagination? I'm working to choose His faithfulness over my doubts.

Keep your head up; because no matter where YOU are, the same goes for you, too.

He is faithful. And He's more interested in, and excited about your future than you are. I guarantee it.

SOMETHING Good

Lately, life's been hard. But it's also been good.

It's a testament to how good our God is that even when we feel completely overwhelmed or completely hopeless, it isn't ever all bad. There are always those little good things.
Even when I have an incredible amount of homework,
ministry takes up more time than I planned,
meetings come up at impractical times,
work is long,
people are tiring,
food is low,
math is hard,
money is gone,
and my head hurts...
The Lord still never gives me more than I can handle. He always provides a ray of sunshine, or a place of rest, or that one encouragement that I need to get me through.

Sometimes it's hard to see, but there's always something good.
It's just a matter of deciding what we look for.

"Break-less"

So I accidentally took off two weeks instead of one... whoops.
The first week was finals week and the second one was fall break week. And one thing stood out to me from these last two weeks:
we really are a break-less people.

But this is no one's fault but our own. It's our own inability! I stayed on-campus during break so that I could get more done. When I ran into one of my few friends who had stayed, he made an interesting comment: "Casey, I don't know how to do nothing."
He went on to explain that his fall break week was not a break, but that was because he didn't know how to take one. And this is practically the norm! In talking with the other students, most of them worked double-time over that week, were slammed with homework (like yours truly) or crammed so many trips and activities in the week that they never had a chance to just sit and enjoy the break.


This generation doesn't know how to sit and enjoy. 

Not only this generation or teenagers and young adults, but adults as well! With cell phones, Netflix, and endless Twitter conversations to keep up with - not to mention the dumb, addictive games and endless gossip - it's no wonder we never rest. Because, for us, rest only comes when there's nothing else to do or text or keep up with or google. But, guess what... That place in life doesn't exist and never will.

We need to re-shape our thinking. Real rest does not happen there is nothing else to do; real rest happens when we make a conscious decision to let our brains and our souls take a break from the texts and the people and the homework and the ministry and the work and the Instagram-photo-taking.

The world will not fall apart if you take time to rest now and then. In fact, the world will be better off if you take the time to rest. Because, honestly, you're a better you when you rest. You're more productive, more successful, friendlier, and healthier....

Want to have a positive effect on this world? Want to give your family the best you possible? Want to be the most effective you can be in your work or your ministry? Take a break and make it count. Turn your phone off for the day, or the afternoon, and take a drive somewhere. Think about as little as possible; reconnect with God; go somewhere cool; lay on your bed and stare at the ceiling; read a couple of chapters in that novel, just because; do anything!

JUST TAKE A BREAK.

Living Loved - A Simple Truth that Will Transform Your Relationships

Typically I don't really know what I want to write, I just simply sit and write it. My life on the inside makes its way to the outside, and on the outside it looks way different than it feels more often than not.

All that to say, there's only one thing that I'm trying to communicate today, and I oddly know what it is: LIVING LOVED.
Mainly, I'm speaking in context of community and spirituality. But living loved is crucial to transforming the community we live in and transforming our relationship with the Lord. And once you see it, you'll wonder why you haven't before.

This wasn't something I thought up. I attended a leader's retreat last weekend where the guest speaker spoke a bit on community. Your team in ministry becomes a lot like your family, and if you have ugliness in your heart, it comes out around family.

But where does this ugliness in your heart come from?
What is the poison to community?
We discussed several things: a consumer, "feed me" mentality, jealousy and comparison, misplaced identity, competition...

We also discussed the horrible feeling of needing to earn the Lord's grace by being "better", or having the best ministry in town, or working harder and harder to please Him.
It is difficult to realize we don't have to earn this.

We are naturally ugly, selfish, sinful people.
But, get this: we're also completely loved.
What does this change?
Well, it should change everything.

If I'm living in the confidence that I'm completely loved, am I worried about comparing myself? Am I sad about being left out? Am I struggling with putting my identity in the opinions and judgements and affirmation from the people around me? Am I consumed with a competitive spirit that insists I have to come out on top? Not in the slightest.

When I know I am completely loved, it doesn't change the fact that I'm a sinner with an ugly heart that is going to be seen every now and again (and probably more than I'd like).
But it transforms how I see others.
It changes how I see myself around them.
And I don't try to earn love in the same ways I did before.

I'm completely loved even when I'm don't fit into a certain group, or when someone's gifts out-shine my own, or when I realize I have ten new zits on my chin and I'm paired up with the pretty girl for prayer teams. I'm no longer seeking my identity in others because it doesn't matter where I fit or what they think of me or how insecure I am. I AM LOVED. Completely, irrevocably and eternally. It can't change, be taken, or even ever diminish.

When this hits your heart, you'll find the freedom to embrace who you really are, and also have the confidence to interact with others without insecurity of feelings of inferiority. You'll also find the freedom to have joy in your relationship with the Lord again, because it doesn't matter how great your ministry is or how long it's been since you swore, nothing can change His love for you. It could never increase; it could never decrease. You are covered in the absolute limit of 100% of God's love 100% of all the time. What a relief. We are, after all, "dearly loved children," (Eph. 5:1). Maybe we should believe it...


Seriously, though. It's so cool to me that everyone in the world could think I'm the dorkiest gal in the world with nothing to offer and it would never matter because I know I'm loved by Someone whose opinion means more than anyone else's ever could. And even cooler that I could be the sinner of all sinners or the saint of all saints and the Lord's love would stay the same.

Think about this a bit and let me know what you think.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, DEARLY LOVED!!
Love, Case

Time Management and Ministry

Last week I talked a bit about my excitement in being further involved in Young Life.. but there have been some challenges, too. The biggest one being my time.

Time is a tricky thing for me. I'm not good at managing it, and my priorities tend to get a little bit scrambled out of place (i.e., my room gets cleaned last, my bank account gets cleaned first). Anybody who knows me also would tell you that I have a hard time saying "no" to things. These days, though, most of these things have to do with ministry.

Here's what I mean: I'm finally in a place where a dream of mine - being regularly involved in high school ministry - is a reality. However, what happens in ministry? You're involved with people. What happens when you're involved with people? They have needs. Those needs demand time and attention. Time and attention I can be too willing to give.

Last week brought me to a breaking point because my whole morning was put on hold by a high school girl telling me about her college plans/family probs. I realized after that I sacrifice half of my day without making sure it was a sacrifice the Lord wanted me to make. I'm not called to be Him. And sometimes there will be needs that I won't fill because He will want to fill them on His own.

Norman Grubb wrote a book called Rees Howells: Intercessor, (an incredible book that I would recommend to anybody, especially those going into ministry). At one point, Grubb writes about Howells' struggles to know when God was asking him to give. The Lord had blessed Howells with the willing heart and the available finances to help those in need, but had to teach him that sometimes jumping in to help too quickly actually took away the Lord's opportunity to perform miracles in that person's life and grow their faith in a way that Rees Howells never could have caused.

I guess I'm learning the same thing with my time. Just as Rees Howells had to say, "Lord, this money is simply Yours that You've given me to take care of here. Tell me when to give, and when to not, because You know what brings You the most glory," I want the Lord to teach me to have that mindset with my time. A complete surrender that says, "Lord, this time isn't mine; it's a gift You've given me, to accomplish Your will. Give me clear direction on when to give it, and when to use it differently."

("Ministry" in the sense I am talking about, is used more in the context of Young Life or church ministry, or something like that... I do wholly believe that ministry goes beyond "churchy" or evangelistic things. Loving my family or the grocery-store cashier is just as much ministry. But mostly what I'm struggling with is how much time I do/don't invest in youth ministry).

Ministry is just like anything else that takes time, like blogging, or shopping, or Flappy Bird. It can take all your time. Ministry, I feel, can be even more dangerous though, because when you're pouring all time into ministry, it can be accompanied with self-righteousness or self-satisfaction. I don't want to ever feel like I'm "doing a good job" just because I spent 30 hours a week of ministry. I want to feel like I'm "doing a good job" because I'm giving exactly what He wants me to give - even if its two minutes.

This really doesn't have a point aside from letting ya'll in on what's on my heart lately. Hopefully it's something for you to think on;)
Have ya'll struggled with anything similar?

Love,
      Case

Lake Champion

Young Life camp.
How do I even begin to explain...

I found myself reflecting a lot on the last few days I was up in New York for Young Life camp, reflecting on how I've gotten here. Sitting on a giant rock on the edge of Lake Champion I thought how funny it was that the Lord used a random friend I made on the first day of college to bring me to leading Young Life a few short months later. I didn't even know this ministry existed a year ago: a ministry that gives me the structure and opportunity to do the type of youth ministry I've always wanted to do.

Our cabin

I'm still trying to untwist the many thoughts and emotions I have involving last week. There are so many... But what stands out the most is excitement. To be surrounded by so many incredible and encouraging leaders for an entire week, and be serving these teenagers that completely won my heart, really did make it one of the best weeks. And I'm so pumped to continue with this ministry after seeing God move so incredibly.
I've also grown so thankful for my team at Deep Creek high school, and so thankful I was stationed at that school. They're more like family than teammates, and have had so much grace for me learning the ropes these past few months. I see Jesus in them, in some of the realest ways I've ever seen.

My teammates (minus Jimmy) Vito, Sara & Zach

117 kids stood up at the end of the week to accept Christ as their Savior. And what's awesome, is that those kids are now surrounded by peers and leaders from their schools and cities that will help them on and mentor them in their new faith. I can't not be overwhelmed with awe at the Lord's goodness and crazy-good planning skills...

The Deep Creek Crew <3

Definitely the highlight of my summer...
What's been the highlight of yours?
Love,
     Case